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TV star’s pregnancy prompts teen talks
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FarkWhen Kay Ermish heard that television star Jamie Lynn Spears was pregnant at 16, she used the news to begin a conversation with her 14-year-old daughter.
“I brought it up. I asked if she had seen the news,” Ermish said. “Then I said, ‘What do you think?’”
Those two questions opened the door to an important discussion between mother and daughter. “We talked about the consequences in her (Spears’) life,” Ermish said. “We just went through all the facts.”
Although the news that Spears, star of the popular Nickelodeon series “Zoey 101,” is pregnant might be disappointing, Ermish believes it’s also a perfect time to broach an uncomfortable subject: teen pregnancy. “(It shows) that this can happen to anyone,” she said.
A counselor with Catholic Social Services in Rapid City, Ermish counsels expectant teens, and recently formed a support group for young expectant mothers. So far, however, no one has taken advantage of the group, which is one of the biggest problems when it comes to this issue, Ermish said. Teens don’t want to talk or think about it.
The United States has one of the highest teen pregnancy rates and births in the western industrialized world, according to the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy. About 750,000 girls will become pregnant each year before they reach the age of 20.
In South Dakota, about 54 out of every 1,000 girls between the ages of 15 and 19 will become pregnant. Ermish said 90 percent or more in South Dakota will keep their children.
While teen pregnancy rates have dropped slightly, Ermish believes the drop isn’t significant and doesn’t show progress on the issue.
She believes that teens remain uninformed when it comes to teen pregnancy and the realities of teen parenthood. They don’t realize that teen parents have a higher drop-out rate or that teen mothers are more likely to be the victim of domestic violence. “They don’t show that in movies,” Ermish said of the consequences.
Along with the news about Spears’ pregnancy, Hollywood recently released the film “Juno,” which tells the story of a pregnant teen who decides to place her child for adoption. That movie also has spurred discussion and some concerns that teen pregnancy might be glamorized.
Ermish hasn’t seen the movie but said it could be another way for parents to talk about the realities of teen pregnancy and parenthood.
Talk about the fact that movies and television aren’t reality. Let your teen talk about the ways that a pregnancy would change the life of a teen in the real world. “TV doesn’t really do a good job of explaining what these consequences are,” she said.
With her own daughter, Ermish talked about how Spears came to be in the predicament she is in. “One of the things parents can say is, maybe she (Spears) didn’t respect her body,” she said.
Kids often will express their sadness for peers who are dealing with a teen pregnancy. That doesn’t necessarily mean they approve, she said. “I think most teens are going to say they don’t approve,” Ermish said. “But I think they will be more compassionate.”
Ermish said the discussion with her own daughter proved to be a positive one. Her daughter was able to voice her thoughts on the subject without feeling she was being lectured. And it reminded her daughter that life decisions come with significant consequences.
“I feel like it’s a teaching opportunity,” Ermish said.
Contact Lynn Taylor Rick at 394-8414 or lynn.taylorrick@rapidcityjournal.com.
Catholic Social Services counselor Kay Ermish and her daughter Alyssa, 14, openly discussed Jamie Lynn Spears’ pregnancy and hope that other mothers and daughters do as well. “It’s a bad mistake, but that doesn’t make her a bad person,” Alyssa says of Spears’ young age. “She needs to decide to become a good mother,” Kay Ermish says. (Kristina Barker/Journal staff)
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