The Fives: Pious pets, drunken cows and the world's largest non-official Viagra advertisement

By Todd Williams, Journal staff | Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Previous Page

Share

• del.icio.us
• Digg
• NewsVine
• Fark

Print

Email

Sometimes, I think the news gets pretty weird around here. I mean, we did have the guy who allegedly stumbled into mid-afternoon traffic and began firing arrows from a bow at passing traffic.

And there was the guy who miraculously survived an enormous nail into the skull during a construction a few years ago.

But then I hit the Web and realize that the competition for the ridiculous is about as tough as obtaining a "no down payment, no interest" loan these days.

Here's a few of the past week's more unusual news offerings.

A new leash on the afterlife?

A church in Weymouth, Mass., is looking to expand its congregation in a remarkably unusual way.

Pastor Rachel Bickford recently launched a weekly "Woof 'n' Worship services on Sundays where parishoners can bring their dogs. She says she got the idea from Psalms in the Bible that spoke to "letting all living things praise the Lord."

But where does it end? What about cats? Or pet fish? Or more exotic pets such as parrots or ferrets?

And if it is only dogs, does that make them the chosen?

Bovine on a bender

A picture is worth a thousand words, but I just have to wonder what words the image posted on AOL's news service with this story evokes. (Click on the link above)

The story behind the official police mug shot of Middletown, Ohio's Michelle Allen is about as bizarre as the photo itself. Apparently, Allen was charged with disorderly conduct last month after she was caught impeding traffic and chasing children. One news service is reporting Allen was hired to wear the costume to advertise for a haunted trail theme park but left the job to hit the bars.

A man, a girlfriend, the toilet and the lottery

This one paints quite a picture of rural Kansas.

When we last left Kory McFarren of Great Bend, Kan., he had been pleaded no contest to misreatment of a dependent adult charges after he failed to find help for his obviously ill girlfriend who had spent a whopping two years on the toilet.

But McFadden's luck seems to have turned as he won for a second time this year the state lottery. He hit the $2 Bonus Crossword ticket Monday for a whopping $20,000 jackpot.



An enthusiastic Viagra backer gets busted

I suppose that in New York, this was just another site to see in the Big Apple. But what's funny about Arye Sachs enthusiastic support of the e.d. aid Viagra is that the company just doesn't want it.

Sachs has been tugging around an enormous 25-foot-long replica of a missile with the words "Viva Viagra" on the sides. But Pfizer says the man shouldn't be allowed to use the company's logo on the side of the rocket.

What? Are they going to be embarrassed by it?

Anyway, there's a good photo of the beast on the unofficial Dave Barry Blog, as well as some classic comments about the fake projectile. My favorite is the part about it turning into a firecracker after 36 hours.

The naked truth

Ray Stevens would be proud

I thought the '70s were over. But apparently  for one Western man in Tokoyo who decided to take a midday swim in the buff at the Imperial Palace.

Police chased the middle-aged man around the palace moat for nearly an hour as local TV stations rushed to the scene. I can only imagine if a similar incident took place on the White House grounds and a streaker somehow got inside the gate. I'm sure our Secret Service would just chase him around the grounds for an hour or so.

But that's beside the point.

My favorite part of the story is a police official who offered up this gem of a quote: "If you know what is within the moat, you won't go skinny dipping there."

That, and it's one of the most public places in the planet giving the relative population of Tokyo. But that, too, I suspect is beside the point.